6.12.2006

Suffer more, sophomore.

I'm scared. Very scared. Tomorrow is the day I begin my life as a second year high school student. The day that I return to what I left just 2 months ago. School.

you: why are you scared?

Why am I scared?
No, 'tis not the teachers. The teachers at my school are fairly competent and actually able to encourage students to study.
It's not the students, either. Even with all the enemies, rivalries, backstabbing, backbiting, lying, and cheating...
It's not the curriculum... Although we have 14 units to fill, under which are 13 subjects with 14 books...
It's not even the school itself. My school is wonderful in many ways, even if it does look like it's about to collapse on itself.

No, I'm afraid to go back because I'm afraid to learn.

you: *blink blink* Wha??

I'm afraid to learn.

you: Didn't you say that the curriculum-

No, it's not that. I'm afraid of learning. Let me explain.
Last year was my first year at Pisay. Oh, yes, I was very precocious, arrogant, confident, stuff like that. I had a bubble of indifference around me, and I was blissfully ignorant to the realities of life.

Oh, how that changed.

I soon learned of the harsh truths and lies of life. I learned of backstabbing and false friends. I learned of dividing social cliques and power struggles. I learned of unacceptance and intolerance. I learned of depression and obssession. I learned of ignorance and hatred. I learned of desperation and conspiration. I learned of backbiting and whispering behind backs. I learned of biases and bigotry. I learned of sex and sex roles. I learned of lies to others and lies to one's self. I learned of sweet relationships and how they go sour. I learned of paranoia and protectiveness. I learned of failures and fates. I learned of fake love and mutual understandings. I learned of the Truth, that nothing is ever truly true.

Who says that we don't learn anything at school?

1 Comments:

Blogger oriocookie said...

woah. that's all i can say

6/13/2006 07:51:00 PM  

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