3.13.2007

10 ways parents lose respect [Profanity post]

"Honor thy father and thy mother." The fourth commandment should and shall be followed. But then again, that's assuming that our fathers and mothers honor and respect us. This post is in response to one of my friend's extremely unreasonable, unloving, and hateful parents (at least from my point of view and the point of view of everyone outside their family). And it kinda brings back my own bad memories of my parents. These are the top 10 things parents (in general) say, do, or think towards my generation that make me want to wish I died sometime in the first few days rather than me having lived on for 15 years.

10. "When I was your age, we didn't have... I didn't do... I used to..."
This is the sort of thing all parents say - and it's one of the more stupid things that they all say. Can't they realize that times have CHANGED (for either better or worse) ever since they were our age? We don't live on a farm with 11 other siblings; we never experienced having to walk 3 miles to school every day; we were never under Marcos's martial law; we don't listen to vinyl records; we never had to work for a living at the age of 10! Some people may see this as us under-appreciating what they did and what they've gone through, but can't they see that without us living in the exact same circumstances as they did before, we can never understand or live the way they did? They can't blame us for being dependent on our computers and cellphones and the Internet, or for texting or chatting online, or for being glued to TVs and computer screens. They can't tell us that we're too young to be going out with our friends at least twice a month, or that we don't dress modestly or properly. Times change and generations change.

9. "My son/daughter is better than my sister's/brother's/neighbor's son/daughter!"
Stage parents should be tied up in performance wear, mouths stuffed with deflated basketballs and crumpled up report cards, and shoved down a big hole with their "I think I'm the PTA head and my child should get more privileges" mentalities. It's embarrassing enough that these kind of parents flaunt their children like sports trophies or beauty pageant crowns, but they have to bash other parents' children as well.
"Oh, your son can't play sports, BWAHAHAHAH"
"Oh, your daughter's skin isn't as flawless as my daughter's, MUFUFUFUFU."
And, what's worse, these parents think that they have very right to invade and meddle in the private and social lives of their teens.
"OMG, my son isn't going to win his class elections - I should discredit that other boy!"
"OMG, my daughter doesn't have a date to the prom! I should shout and bitch at that other girl so may daughter can have her date!"
Stage moms and soccer dads - a new breed of idiots.

8. "You're too old!"
Too old to drop a plate, to watch TV a lot, to not act our age, to spill a glass of water. Too mature to cry, to whine about problems, to ask for help with the little things, to run to our parents when we're scared. Too grown up to ask for toys, to run around, to be afraid of the dark, to make mistakes. Too far into our years to ask for ice cream, to sleep in bed when we feel bad, to cry when we're sad. According to them, we're too old to have a childhood, and too old to be human. And this is especially irksome with...

7. "You're too young!"
Paired with the previous, this statement makes you feel like you're not actually allowed to live a life. Too young to stay up until 12, too young to go out with your friends, too young to commute. Too young to have a phone, too young to have an MP3 player, too young to have a computer. Too young to care about what we wear, too young to have Starbucks drinks, too young to chat or network online. Too young to sleep over at someone's house, too young to blog, too young to go to concerts. Too young to fall in love, too young to date, too young to try the waters. Too young to deal with violence and sex, too young to talk about politics, too young to read books like "The Da Vinci Code." Too young to know of people's affairs. Too young to have an opinion, too young to actually matter - no one over the age of 18 takes you seriously when you're below 18. No one. We're not even allowed to speak our minds in mature discussions.

6. "This isn't good enough for us."
Most teens (especially in Pisay) feel that all their parents want is for them to be the best. There's nothing wrong with this in itself. But when parents never take one's best as good enough, this is going too far. For some parents, we're supposed to be perfectly engineered products of their sperm and egg - the best of the best. A 1.0 wouldn't be good enough for them if there was a 0.5 grade. These are parents with big problems, grudges, and regrets with themselves; these are variations of stage parents. They live through their kids. When they themselves couldn't be #1, they expect genetics to work out the kinks. "Till my good is better, and my better best betterer." Are we humans or robots??

5. "Family should ALWAYS be first - your friends won't always be there for you."
Few parents seem to understand that their children have lives outside of their houses. They can't seem to accept the fact that growing and maturing individuals meet different people and have relationships, whether healthy or not, with those people. What's more, some parents actually try to keep their children from having friends. These sorts of parents believe that people outside the family will just tear their teen away from them. They are paranoid, misguided, and people unfit to become parents - they won't let their teens go in the world. It's actually the other way around - friends will be the ones who will always be there, even when family has thrown you down and pushed you into the dirt.

4. "We can't trust you because..."
Because you messed up once some long time ago. Because you're not an adult yet. Because I think you shouldn't be trusted. Because you're a teenager. Because you have low grades. Because you haven't proven your worth. Because... because you're you. Trust should be given sparingly, but trustingly and lovingly.


3. "Don't give me that crap."
Few adults respect the opinions, words, and thoughts of the younger generations. You actually have to be twenty-something and employed to be taken seriously in this world. Of course our minds are young and developing - but it doesn't f*cking mean that everything we say and do is CRAP. FEW PARENTS - AND ADULTS IN GENERAL - LISTEN TO TEENS JUST BECAUSE THEY F*CKING THINK THAT THEY'RE SO MUCH SMARTER AND BETTER. They have this mentality that EVERYTHING THAT THEY F*CKING SAY AND DO IS MUCH MORE CORRECT, MUCH MORE MATURE, AND MUCH MORE REASONABLE. Sure, adults are generally more mature and more experienced, but it DOESN'T GIVE THEM THE MOTHERF*CKING RIGHT TO TRAMPLE DOWN WHAT WE THINK, SAY AND FEEL LIKE SH*T ROTTING IN THE DAMNED SOIL. "Don't give me that crap" is their way of not listening to us, and another example of their being extremely damn unreasonable. By making us feel inferior and stupid, they continue to exercise their control over us and push our faces further into the sh*t-filled dirt of a destroyed self-esteem.


2. "We're doing this for your own good./We always know what's good for you./We're doing this because we love you."
How are swearwords, comments like "stupid idiot" and "family f*ck-up", and threats like "I'll disown you" and "you'll never see your friends again" MOTHERF*CKING SUPPOSED TO HELP US?! These are, under no circumstances, WORDS OF PARENTS' PROMISED UNCONDITIONAL LOVE AND CARE. These things will NEVER WORK TOWARDS OUR GOOD, not unless their definition of good is a traumatic childhood or a future as a serial killer. They will NOT ALWAYS KNOW WHAT IS BEST, BECAUSE THEY ARE HUMAN TOO AND ALSO MESS UP. At some point in our lives or another, agreeing to them will only hurt us. Parents are not gods, and even God himself (being called the Merciful One) would never say such things to 12-16 year olds.

1. "WALA KANG KWENTA - You're worthless."
Three words in reply: Fuck you too.



Parents - TRUE ones - show respect and give love unconditionally. We, as children, must give respect and love unconditionally as well. Sometimes, though, it just gets too difficult to love and respect the people who don't love and respect us as well.

Yes, I have issues. You can't get me without those.

1 Comments:

Blogger Unknown said...

hmm..
can relate.. But still, they are our parents we owe them our educ, our stuff, and basically our life. Though they only want to keep us safe and stuff like that, i also couldn't help but agree that they act like total idiots sometimes.

3/13/2007 10:16:00 PM  

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